Vanderpump Rules
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I wasnt shocked about the Tom and Katie of it all.
I read Page Six.
I go toDaily Mailparties.
Those only happen on this show.)
I was not surprised by this at all.
Its the brand-new opening that made me almost stand up out of my chair.
For the first time in a decade, we are outside of SUR!
We start with a zip by Schwartz and Sandys, where the two bro-trepreneurs toast at the bar.
Next, the drone flies to Tom Tom, where Katie, Lala, and Ariana hold court.
What is even going on?
Who is this dog with Lisa that is not Giggy?
Has he finally been caught by the Ghostbusters and sent off to his eternal reward?
And why is no one spilling anything?
There is not one martini entirely on the floor.
There is not a hankie dress in sight.
Honey, we havent just updated we have upgraded!
The entire show also has.
Just look at everything we get in this episode.
I know I have been optimistic before, but folks, it looks like we have a season.
Im glad these deep connections are finally being exploited.
They met only six-ish weeks after Raquel dumped him, and theyve already moved in together.
Of course, he does.
James has a demanding alcoholic mother who he is always trying to (unsuccessfully) just.
The pattern between Ally and Raquel is evident to everyone, including Raquel.
There is the UNESCO World Heritage Site known as the SUR alleyway right there at the restaurant.
Couldnt you have fought there for old times sake?
This is the same kettle of fish, just being boiled over an entirely different flame.
Remember when I said that the show isnt relying on fake storylines anymore?
I meant all but this one.
I dont believe this for a second.
This happens in real life, of course, but Peter datinganyone?
It has to be producers.
Weve seen the headlines about him and Raquel.
I cant wait to watch this devolve.
Katie is having some fun, though.
Schwartz is having trouble in his other relationship as well.
He and Sandoval have spent $1 million on Schwartz and Sandys, and its still not open.
No wonder its not.
Sandoval shows up with a bunch of tchotchkes he found thrifting and wants to put them in the bar.
She says, No more changes before this party on Friday, right?
Even worse, Sandoval took off for months to work with his new band, and Schwartz felt abandoned.
(Sandoval does look fetching with a mustache, which was Arianas idea.
She knows that a mustache makes every face 78 percent more handsome.
That is science.)
These two seem reunited, which is more than I can say for Schwartz and Lala.
Its like a human crock pot, and there is no way this works, right?
I mean, it cant possibly, right?
So the Schwarz and Lala beef started when Lala broke up with Randall.
But I get her point.
If theyre telling him things about Lala, he could use it in court.
Tom says that the meeting was egotistical of her, but I think it makes perfect sense.
These are all public figures.
Theyre going on podcasts, red carpets, andWatch What Happens Live.
Seven months after this, Schwartz goes to play pickleball with Randall.
As everyone points out, he is not the only person in L.A. who plays this faddish sport.
I mean, there is literally a pickleball court on the roof of the municipal building that overlooks SUR.
Because they hung out, Lala has cut Schwartz out of her life.
In this instance, Schwartz is entirely wrong.
But you know that when you choose one, the other is dead to you for life.
Lala made the right decision.
However, I dont think she has the best tactic in going about it.
She says, This is a year of burning bridges.
Okay, its one thing to cut him out; its another thing to make him mad.
If you want toensurethat he talks shit about you to Randall, burn that bridge.
Right now, she needs as few enemies as possible, notmoreenemies.
Though something seemed off.
The mail on the table had been moved.
There was an extra glass in the sink.
It smelled like someone has been shaving their forehead in the bathroom.
His lover stirred a bit.
Where have you been?
he asked, half groggy.
But Schwartz didnt answer.
He planted a kiss on Sandovals forehead, his cheek, then square on his mouth.
Tom asked a question, but Tom wouldnt answer.
This recap has been updated to correct the confusion of Lala and Raquel.
Dame Moylan apologizes and regrets the error.
