The Ultimatum: Queer Love
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Thats exactly how I felt when shit started to go down between Mildred and Tiff at the reunion.
Like, oh, we all thought we were watching this fun little reality dating show.
Now, were watching them talk about their abusive behavior, and the situation is no longer fun.
But then, Im a words-of-affirmation gal, so what do I know?
(But its not now!
Because of the reunion!)
Mildred says she loves Tiff unconditionally, and Tiff says they love how complex Mildred is.
Tiff proposes, and theyre going to move in together.
It seems so nice!
(And yet!)
Aussie and Sam, I really didnt know about.
That is very funny when looking back on it, but at the time, OMG.
If I were Sam, I would shout, SERIOUSLY?
If youre looking for a fact-check on the penguin story, by the way,I got you.
Sam is much more patient than I am, and Aussie does in fact propose with an actual ring.
I am surprised all around!
Aussie asks if Sam wouldve been happy if Sam only had the labradorite, and Sam says, No!
Sam is my favorite.
Okay, you Xander and Yoly fans.
Its time for the Xander and Vanessa ultimatum.
But lets talk real quick about Vanessa.
I went on the exact same emotional arc.
But do you know how many forced, fake, chaotic people there are in this world?
Yeah, they need to deal with their shit, but they dont deserve fandom-level hate.
She lookeddefeatedon the reunion because shes seen the show and she knows how she comes off.
That being said, Vanessa definitely does not come off well during the proposal.
Or lack of proposal, rather.
Xan essentially says theyre not on the same page and that Xan wants to work on herself.
Vanessa tells Xan they had the best relationship (did you??).
Its a very tear-filled lesbian breakup.
Yoly is a Supreme Waffler.
You never know what shes going to decide!
Is it no one?
Who knows whither Yolys feelings will take her today?!
And not even the reunion: a ten-second title card we seeafterthe reunion.
Something, something, Rae, she says.
Lexi accepts Raes proposal, and then LEXI proposes, and Ilovea gay double proposal.
Lexi calls Rae her Scoopy.
I am a fan.
But lets talk about the reunion.
The beloved-by-me JoAnna Garcia Swisher is moderating and doing a great impersonation ofPrincess Giselle.
JoAnna asks the only question we care about: Who is still together?
), and Tiff and Mildred not only broke up but they broke upacrimoniously.
Their part is horrible.
There were arguments about Mildreds son; something about financial difficulties (which sounded like maybe Tiff was struggling?
Tiff called the police on Mildred, and Mildred was arrested.
This is a bad, abusive relationship, and Im extremely glad theyre both out of it.
Sam follows them because Sam is the best.
Good points, Sam!
Tiff leaves in a van, and we dont see them again.
Aussie has been on a journey of self-discovery over the past year.
When asked about regrets, Vanessa regrets making a bad impression on the other participants.
Everyone else seems pretty onboard with what happened, but no one wants to experience another ultimatum ever.
What????
We get a postscript that says shortly after filming, Lexi and Rae decided to end their relationship.
WHAT IS LIFE if the queer women in their 20s who I like dont get married?
OMG, this was a real kick in the gut to end the series.
Someone really nice, kindly go out there and marry Rae ASAP.
So overall, this show was kind of okay!
Now I just require a gay season ofBacheloretteand all will be well.
