The Real Housewives of Orange County
Save this article to read it later.
Find this story in your accountsSaved for Latersection.
Emily cant figure out how to hang up the phone.
Finally, its over.
God, can we bring back receivers?
When Emily finally hangs up with Shannon, they both turn to their respective producers and start screaming.
Dont follow me with that camera.
You know, I cant say on TV that Johns kid hates me.
Dont you dare put that on TV.
You cant stop me.
Im never filming again.
I know Ive said it before but this time I mean it.
Okay, so what time will you all be here for my party on Tuesday?
Its National Taco Day.
What Shannon really says is something she uses often: I didnt sign up for this.
I disagree with that.
However, this doesnotapply to Shannon.
She has been on this show [verifies with Wikipedia] nineyears at this point.
This is what she signed up for and she knows it.
In fact, have the producers unionized?
Because I need to double-check theyre getting hazard pay for dealing with women like this for a living.
Youre on a reality show!
If its not that bad then talk about it.
The show is now about the show and the snake is having its tail for dessert.
Theyre not mad at Shannons accusations, theyre mad that Shannon isnt pulling her weight on the group project.
When Heather arrives to talk to Shannon, theyre both still heated about Shannons blowup at thedoppelganger event.
Shannon then says, Lets talk about those specifics because youre making it into this huge thing.
Shannon insists that things arent bad, theyre just normal.
Last episode she said theyre just normal fights that leave me paralyzed for days.
Okay, thatdoessound bad.
But the fights sound like normal relationship fights.
Also, he is no longer with her so why are we even fighting about this?
Um, not quite.
Shes the one doing it.
Sister, you have a fucking BMW logo implanted into your forehead where it hit the steering wheel!
Its like having sushi prepared by Sensei Baguette.
They have doorsteps in casitas, right?
Did you see that new house?
She asks her very straight son if he knows who Roberto Cavalli is.
Um, Heather, do you know how to playFortnite?
Yeah, thought so.
(Yes,it exists.)
What would a Roberto Cavalli house even look like?
Would it just be, like, animal-print thongs hanging off every available surface?
Its the sort of anodyne, antiseptic luxury that you could find in any Nordstrom.
