The Real Housewives of New Jersey
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Her accent is so inscrutable I think that shes from Kemsleytown, the home of all Dorits.
But if Ma Lexi is from Manchester, how the hell does Lexi talk like a duck with indigestion?
I cant make it make sense.
Jen and Bills relationship falling apart?
Or maybe she should try some lingerie like her daughter Olivia suggests.
That would get Bill out of the pool house and will give Jen an excuse to do more shopping.
Are we supposed to care about Frank and Dolores?
What is that even?
Frank wants to have a dinner for Frankie to celebrate his new dream job.
So crazy we had the same dream.
Anyway, Frank just wants him, Dolores, and the two kids at the dinner.
Dolores wants to bring her new boyfriend, Paulie.
What ever happened toourfamily, Frank says when Dolores makes that point.
Good question, Frank.
You ruined that family when you cheated on Dolores when she was nine months pregnant with your son.
Thats what happened to your family.
I have absolutely no sympathy for him, and I am totally on Doloress side.
At the very tippity-top of that list of people I have no sympathy for is Joe Giudice.
Well, hes second toGeorge Santos, but hes a very, very close second.
I dont blame Joe, Teresa, or their daughters for this; I blame the show.
Teresa says she prays every day that he will be allowed back in the country.
He committed multiple crimes, was sent to jail, and is now barred from entering this country.
Yes, I feel bad that these four girls are not growing up with their father.
But I dont feel bad about why.
He could not have cheated on Teresa and called her a cunt on national television.
He could have done a lot of things, but he did not.
There are really only two conversations and two funny things this entire episode that I care about.
Lets start with the funny things.
The first is when Joe and Melissa surprise Antonia with a white Porsche SUV for her 17th birthday.
(Remind me, what does Joedoagain?)
It was the timing.
You cant script this shit.
The other funny thing is when Teresa is headed to her surprise wedding shower.
Theyre planning a fancy dinner before the wedding, and Melania asks if she can bring a date.
Teresa looks at her daughter in the back seat and says Audriana doesnt have a date.
She pipes up from the back seat, Mom, Im 12.
Give her a spinoff already.
But this car ride brings us to one of the two conversations I care about.
He says that hes not inviting Melissa and Joe.
Teresa then says the camera is on and theyre filming, so he says, Oh, shit.
It sounds like they were conspiring to keep Melissa and Joe out of a cast event.
Because they hate them?
To get them off the show?
To make them look bad and be like, They didnt come to my nice dinner?
I dont know, but it looked shady.
The other conversation is the one that Melissa has with Joe, where they discuss what happened in Ireland.
She says after that, she was done.
After 18 years, she said, Enough.
She will stop trying to just Teresa because she knows she never will.
Its probably the rumor that Danielle will insist on telling Melissa.
Oh, this is a bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad idea.
That is not at all what is happening here.
Danielle has yet to realize that everything on this show is a proxy war between Teresa and Melissa.
Oh, sweet, sweet Danielle, who is too good and too stupid for this world.
Its the same bullshit as always.
Teresa is so excited to see Luiss sisters but doesnt want Melissa there.
She gives a speech and thanks everyone but Melissa.
Even Teresas trainer says she should have said something to Melissa.
She knows the score.
She knows its not intentional.
Its not that Teresa hates her but that she just doesnt think of her.
And I think we may be finished with them.
