The Real Housewives of Miami
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I loved the very end of the episode.
Instead of getting a Next week on … we got Pippen and Jordan talking about an upcoming basketball game.
No, its Larsa and Marcus, not Scottie and Michael.
Sorry, but no Bulls allowed.
Its a great way to show us a preview but seamlessly weave it into a story.
While were talking about changes, can I mention one thing?
Its time for a new opening.
I just never want to see Larsas I DONT GIVE A F blue ruffled dress ever again.
This is one of the best shows on Bravo, and they cant afford a promotional photo shoot.
Usually with the Housewives, they keep things a little bit muddy so that we can decide whats up.
Did Carole Radziwill use a ghostwriter or not?
Where didHeather Gay get her black eye?
Should Andy slide into Troye Sivans DMs?
He already did; decision made.
Its quickly followed by: No seriously … just six hours later.
Larsa keeps asking Guerdy, What are you crying about?
Guerdy tells her that she has breast cancer.
Larsas first response is not, That is awful.
It is not, Im so sorry.
It is not, How can I help.
Her first response is, How was I supposed to know?
How do you know?
Guerdy answers that she got a mammogram.
I mean, if someone tells you they have cancer, you believe them.
Otherwise, believe them.
Guerdy is in no way making this up.
Thats when we get the screen card saying shes going to blab.
Okay, I get it.
But even the way Larsa tells them is rooted in her own experience.
I feel so bad, she tells them as if her feelings should be the major concern here.
I had such a stressful day.
Um, how bad does Guerdy feel?
How about how stressful her days have been?
Larsa doesnt leave it there.
Lisa is asking what stage it is and if she will be all right.
Larsa doesnt know because this isnt her news to tell.
Also, when Guerdy told her, she was probably only mildly listening and didnt get the specifics.
Yet again, Larsa shows no sympathy or empathy (maybe Erika Jaynes therapist can teach her).
Shes just talking about how horrible it was forher.
This all happened at the coming-home party Larsa had for Marcus after he was gone for only five days.
Marcus had no idea!
Also on bad behavior at the party is Lisa.
She says, I could get a therapist, but thats what I have Jody for.
Um, sis, not for much longer if you keep this up.
Bitch to your girlfriends.
Heck, call me up and bitch to me.
Id let you do it for free, but this is a sure way to run a man off.
Even she admits she cant show the kids as much attention because shes so busy screaming about their dad.
And how heartbreaking was it to hear her daughter say, Yeah, we know amid the complaining!
He said someone on the guest list said something about his stepson that he couldnt stomach.
Both he and Alexia refused to say the name Adriana out loud.
Alexia is like, It was that one.
The one you defend.
No, not her.
No, not her, either.
Kiki didnt know what a BJ was but did the best impersonation of an uncircumcised penis Ive ever seen.
That just leaves our Guerdy, the one who has been so wronged and doesnt even know it yet.
She might not be wrong.
Were all on her side.
I got your back.
