The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills
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As soon as shes done speaking, the sound of a drum and chanting comes around the corner.
It is Blue Raven banging a drum and singing, Breathe.
Just breathe through me.
she asks the group, non-rhetorically.
Rich women, they reply in unison.
What are we doing?
Okay, guys, the season is coming up and we all need to get on the same page.
Meet me in Malibu.
There will be a shaman.
There are a few excellent moments even before they get to Eaglewomans ceremony.
We then get Lisas email to Bravo where she quit.
Thank you for a great 8 years!!!!
Um, thats it?
Thats how it went down?
This makes it looks like Lisa quit, but who does that narrative serve?
Does it serve Bravo?
and Erika replies, Are you?
Yes, both of them have gotten considerably skinnier than they were last year.
Kyle says it is thanks to diet, exercise, and not drinking.
Erika says that she is on some good hormones.
It also probably helps that shes gotten off of Lexapro.
Thankfully we have Dorit to come on and say, Are hormones spelled O-Z-E-M-P-I-C?
When the women start talking, there are two major beefs.
The first is between Erika and Dorit.
I see Erikas point, especially when she asks Dorit if her marriage is strong and Dorit says yes.
If theyre still together, why should it bother her?
But I also get Dorits point.
But as your friend, I would like to apologize if I was rough, if I was vicious.
I have never felt so low.
I have never felt so hurt.
I love you all and I am very sorry.
The other big beef is really about Kyle and Kathy.
Garcelle says she was confused by Kyle because she wasnt going after Erika and Rinna for attacking her sister.
Cut to the home scenes.
Sutton talks about her horse, Storyline.
Okay, sure, LVP had mini horses, but this is a maxi horse!
Then we move on to Crystal.
She doesnt get a home visit.
Or to say anything to Eaglewoman.
Is Crystal even here or did Carlton abduct her?
Jaid is obsessed with his girlfriend, but Jax is obsessed with making his mother feel bad.
They are currently in therapy.
Maybe Erika is the new Allison Dubois.
We end the episode where it all began, with Kyle.
Kyle does not feel the same way.
In fact, shes impatient with him to get off the phone.
She doesnt want to have to schedule a time to talk about their schedules, but here they are.
He doesnt even know how many tattoos she currently has.
I think thats enough tattoos, yeah?
If I want to, I will, Kyle says.
I will not allow that.
You dont have a choice.
I think that kind of says it all, doesnt it?
