The Golden Bachelor
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And then there were 12.
As Leslie says, its getting to be crunch time.
A for April, S for Susan, K for Kathy, N for Nancy: ASKN?
They even have a motto, Kathy informs us: Youre askin, were tellin.
I do have some notes.
Namely: Who is doing the asking?
The viewers at home?
And what exactly are they telling us, or them, or him?
This weeks group date is a talent show in which all the women are obligated to participate.
The stakes are high.
The whole segment is pretty fun, mostly just because I like these women a lot.
and then grabbing her own.
Thats showbiz, baby.
They cant all be winners.
I hope this is exactly what her therapy sessions are like.
Leslie, the actual professional performer formerly known as Sexy Dancer, is in her element.
Leslie understood the assignment.
Her routine is perfectly calibrated between genuinely impressive and silly, hot, and wholesome.
And yet, criminally, she loses.
Joan, Joan, Joan.
Gerry liked that she put herself out there at the talent show.
She likes that hes super-handsome.
They talk about figuring out when is the right time to start dating after losing a spouse.
(Coincidentally, this is also what happens when you win the Pulitzer Prize for Poetry.)
I mention this because, to my eyes, I thought the date with Joan went … fine?
But the events of the following morning lead me to believe Id significantly underestimated Gerrys infatuation with her.
Shes got to go.
Joan takes Gerry aside and breaks the bad news.
That is genuinely beautiful.
She cries in the car.
He cries on a bench.
I realize this is your life, sir, but respectfully, I dont care.
After getting almost zero one-on-one time with Gerry this week, shes ruminating and obsessively rehashing their date.
Kathy is not amused.
Its dismissive and its disrespectful.
During her alone time with the Gatch, Kathy tearfully explains shes had a rough day.
Naturally, he wants to know whats bothering her.
He presents her with a just-stop-crying rose in advance of the ceremony.
It does the trick.
In the immediate aftermath of the rose ceremony, Theresa doubles down on her cluelessness.
Its as if she cannot physically restrain herself from telling Kathy (Kathy?!
If you must blab, choose literally anyone else in the house!
Talk to a houseplant!)
all about the lovely moment she just had with Gerry in the bedroom.
In the immortal words of Kathy, Zip your lip.
