The Bachelorette
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I hate that I predicted the History-Making SHE-E-O Live Laugh Love Self-Care Finale Presented by Maybelline.
I knew that Jenn would be proposing to her Final One.
Go back.Look at my first recap of the season.
I believe my exact words were shed be proposing to someone tall.
Im sure Neil Lane will workshop the title as this trend sweeps the nation.
Lets get into it.
I mean … how do we even breakthis thingdown?
I bet if I checked your Google history, I wouldnt find boyfriends eyebrow microexpressions + attachment issues.
And what did the Marcus of it all amount to?
It was very obvious to pretty much anyone watching that Marcus was not a viable option for Jenn.
Will it be Marcus, and there was complete silence.
Yeah, thats where the audience is at.
hey get that man off our televisions.
The vibes are bad.
We should allow Jenn a do-over.
Only cast men whose ex-girlfriends didnt cheat on them and have been through a weekend-long communication seminar.
And more than one East Asian guy.
I feel unmoored from reality because it all amounted to nothing.
I guess we can track Jenns arc through this episode?
Is that worth it to you all?
I feel like a substitute teacher after class got interrupted by a fire drill.
Okay, I planned for us to go over the quiz, but theres not enough time now.
Should we just play Heads Up 7 Up?
Thats not a satisfying arc for anyone to watch and even worse to go through emotionally.
Throughout the episode, we get to see Jenn closing the loops on all these dangling story threads.
She sits down with Marcus and breaks up with himeven thoughhe says that he loves her.
Shes able to recognize an emotionally unavailable man.
She wrestles some control fromThe Bacheloretteprocess to propose!
They gave her a little seashell!
Shes able to love and be loved unconditionally and without fear!
Ohhh, how I wish the episode ended there.
Pilot Rachel literally ran offstage with Aven after he asked, Do you wanna get outta here?
Where was that for Jenn?
No one left a handout for this scenario.
Okay, thats the bell!
If your teacher asks, we got through everything on the quiz!
