The Bachelorette
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One such format shake-up: We dont see Jesse Palmer at all in this episode.
(We hear his voice in a post-credit stinger.)
Maybe he got distracted wandering around the French Quarter.
Oh yeah, were in New Orleans now.
We get all the classics of a new location: contestants half-heartedly yelling We love New Orleans!
We also find out that Aaron is maybe from New Orleans?
[Okay, hi past Emily, its Emily from the future.
I looked it up Aaron went to Tulane, so NOLA is his college town.
But speaking of meeting his family, everyones talking about how hometowns are next week???
This season is flying by!
Less manufactured filler leaves more time for organic conflicts to arise.
For example, Sean and Tanner are both sad about not getting one-on-ones.
And this week, theyre put on a two-on-one.
Usually the two-on-one date is reserved for when the girlies (gender-neutral) are fighting.
Its a classic walking-around-the-city date.
(Is it stolen valor to wear Mardi Gras beads without flashing someone?)
Its boring to watch, but theyre vibing.
(She also gets a little cliche, saying things like, Love will truly triumph over everything.
Its fine to be a little cliche when youre smitten, I suppose!)
Joey gets the rose and they are fully making out in the back of the carriage.
Their body language is insane.
Now we get to the drama-free two-on-one.
I just wrote in my notes: Sean is PISSED.
i love it yummyyummyyummy.
Its a ticking clock to see who will crack first and my money is on Sean from the beginning.
He tells some jokes that you just know hes thrilled every time he gets to bust out.
My favorite: When asked, Can we feed them?
he guffaws and says, One time!
Bring the Gator Guy toBachelor in Paradise!
Tanner is nervous after the gator boat because it seems like Sean is hitting it off with Charity.
Even Gator Guy says she clearly prefers Sean.
Personally, I dont think theres anything fun about running, but I dont have Charitys legs.
(Ahem, Brayden.)
Its a great match for Charity, who asks very direct questions and appreciates clarity.
Dotun tells Charity hes falling in love with her, and he gets the rose.
Dude, you just went to college here!
Aaron is acting like hes Philippe II, Duke of Orleans.
Instead of a one-on-one, Aaron is going on a group date with Xavier, Sean, and Tanner.
Instead, were getting a group date with two roses to hand out.
This is such a classic mistake; I cant believe folks are still letting producers talk them into this.
They practically unilaterally choose the latter.
Charity essentially says as much, telling Sean, What you want from me, I cant give you.
With Seans departure, the group date has turned into a three-on-one.
Instead, its pretty much just a cocktail party but without the guys who already have roses.
Xavier is wearing a sweater that looks cozy as fuck.
I want to know if he knitted it himself, and if so, just send me the pattern!
When its Xaviers turn to talk to Charity, he opens up about his fears surrounding marriage.
She needs more time to think.
This girl cannot pull off a fake-out to save her life.
Shes just too straightforward!
Still, its cute how Xaviers face lights up as soon as she gives him the rose.
So now we have our final four: Aaron, Xavier, Dotun, and Joey.
Oh God, theyve got me saying journey now, too.
