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In the years sinceGame of Thronesended on May 19, 2019, a lot has changed.
Namely, the world has been totally ruined.
DidtheGame of Thronesfinaleincite the apocalypse?
Yes, I am talking aboutHouse of the Dragon.
When my editor asked me to write something, I initially said no due to my commitment to myself.
Unfortunately,after I watchedHouse of the Dragon, I had to break that promise.
I realized there was a crucial story to be written.
Why is everyone on this show wearing a half-pony?
Perhaps it has something to do withhistorical accuracy.
Perhaps its to do with the wigs.
Maybe its about crown logistics.
(Easier to put a crown on top of a half-pony than a normal head?)
For me, the half-ponytail has always represented something complex and tenuous.
And dont even get me started on the bumps!
), andGame of Thronesyness (is itGame of Thronesy?).
10.This Almost King
10.
I like the low-key nature of this half-pony.
It suggests minimal effort.
Unfortunately, all of this means its incredibly notGame of Thronesy.
Its moreLord of the Ringsy.
9.This Doomed Pregnant Woman
9.
8.This Interesting Woman
8.
This is an elaborate half-pony that includes both braids and some kind of special ornament.
The execution is incredible and veryGame of Thronesy, but I dont buy its realism.
But this half-pony raises an important question: Who is she?
7.This Main Girl
7.
This is really more of a quarter-pony.
High complexity, high effort, perhaps meant to indicate that this is the Main Girl of the show.
While it is veryGame of Thronesy, it would not hold up while riding dragons.
6.This Main Girls Friend
6.
This is the most traditional half-pony weve seen yet.
I guess this is supposed to be the main girls one Jewish friend.
5.This Important Guy
5.
I like this half-pony.
4.These Randos in the Crowd
4.
They have no faces, they have no names, but they do have incredibly elaborate half-ponies.
3.This Incestuous Uncle
3.
This is the most classic half-pony weve seen thus far.
Its sleek on top, no bumps.
Its also got a great pony-to-hair ratio.
2.The Incestuous Uncles Girlfriend (?)
This one is particularly boho and interesting.
I love Sonoya Mizuno and I hope she is being paid handsomely for this role.
1.This Petite Legend
1.
This gray-haired child has by far the best half-pony in the pilot episode.
Where the heck is her spinoff?
