Luann and Sonja: Welcome to Crappie Lake
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Step aside, Frog and Toad.
They get ice cream and new wigs and goof off in the animal shelters backyard.
Sonja perseveres even though Billy Richard (RichAAAAHHD) has been texting her kissy faces at an alarming rate.
Luann is raw-dogging dairy, even though we all know about the time she shit the bed.
Being isolated in middle-of-nowhere Illinois has distilled a tenderness from them separately too.
I mean, those plants are dead now.
But its the thought that counts.
Love is a cornerstone of platonic relationships too.
Ill quit the corninesssoon, but not until we talk about Craig.
I love seeing them be friends and do friend things, like destroying Craigs spirit.
He looks like hes seen war.
like in the way you would say I love it!
if the cameraperson was holding a gun.
But listen, Craig, theyre here to work.
One is definitely not enough, but three or more feels like a national security threat somehow.
Two feels like enough for the essential tasks.
Speaking of depressing things, we check out the underfunded animal shelter.
The place is run by Bobbie, a redhead who looks like shes trying her best.
This woman, happy to humor them, nods along as though shes never thought of that before.
She tells them that theyve been wanting to put in a fence but that the shelters cash-strapped.
And its good that she does, because Lu and Sonj decide to pay for the fence themselves.
Every dog deserves to shit outside, she tells us.
Lord knows Ive shit outside when Ive had to.
I hear people shit in Crappie Lake.
Pooping wherever is one of our fundamental rights.
The poop talk feels especially appropriate at Dairy Queen.
She is the peoples princess.
Luann, the peoples countess, walks up to the drive-thru to get another round.
Luann tries on a Lisa Rinnaesque wig thats nearly identical to the hairstyle of one of the stores employees.
Sonja slaps on a blonde bob.
Despite Sonjas sticker shock (the $88 pants areon sale?
Who in Benton is shopping here?
), they leave with a haul on credit.
They meet with Craig and City Council member Lee Messersmith to assemble it.
Once the playhouse is set up, Lee locks Luann and Sonja in it as a bit.
Craig is a shell of a man, but hes so happy about the playground that hes tearing up.
(He grew up in this neighborhood.
Aw, Craig!)
What more could anyone want?
