Love Is Blind
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DearLove Is Blindreaders, were just getting to know each other.
If someone is getting proposed to in a movie, my face will be wet.
The Coming up this season onThe Golden Bachelormontage?
I WAS A WRECK.
This double-wedding finale episode?
My face was parched.
Not a tear was shed.
I knew thered be no tears flowing.
Going into this finale, I thought that any outcome was possible.
Because thats what I felt this entire episode.
I can date a fellow millennial!
But thats just not what she wants … but well get to that.
Izzy is arriving at the venue with just a backpack?
How do men arrive with just nothing on their person?
Izzy is still reeling from their fight about him concealing his credit score.
Izzy, youre supposed to leave a little mystery going into the ceremony.
For example, his favorite restaurant is Chipotle.
Oh, ha ha ha!
Lets all LAUGH at the man who likes CHIPOTLE.
And, Im sorry what would she prefer to be his favorite restaurant?
What could the bougiest restaurant in Houston be?
Grow up, Stacy.
Unfortunately, the note rhymes.
Who taught these people about poetry?
SHE READS THIS IN FRONT OF HER MOTHER!
Stacy says that this is the only note Izzy wrote without her having to prompt him.
She says shes a hopeless romantic.
Also, Stacy is wearing those Jimmy Choo wedding shoes.
Those are like $1,200 shoes.
Time for the ceremony!
Izzy enters the event space and says, Whats up?
and does a little twirl.
When Stacy comes in, she says Its a whole lotta dress, yall!
and Izzy shows her off because she looks so good.
What is the tone of this ceremony?
Everyone is too casual.
He also says that Stacy hit him like a train out of left field.
How are the metaphors like a can of nuts?
Stacy somehow repeats this truly bonkers line in her speech that absolutely sounds like shes going to say yes.
She says that the whole experience has been a freakin hurricane and hes the calm in the storm.
Izzy says that he understands and gives her a kiss.
They both leave the ceremony, check in with their families, and have a chat.
Izzy is very confused, and Stacy says that the timing just isnt right.
They need more time to work through their issues.
They could die tomorrow!
The best part is, Why are you 33, single, and not married?
Unbelievable shade followed by some emotional whiplash.
Thats why we turn toLove Is Blind.
Its time for Lydia and Miltons big day!
Theres considerably less drama because these two are (somehow) making their way toward marriage.
Its very hard to discuss what Lydia says about Milton because itsverygeneric.
She basically says, He holds me every night.
Im marrying the love of my life.
Its here that Miltons immaturity really comes through.
Miltons dad brings him some cuff links and asks Milton if hes got any questions.
Milton says About what?
His dad even shakes his head and goes, You got it figured out.
But I think thinking you know everything is basically what being 24 is like.
Time for the ceremony!
Lydias brother is crying.
Hes shedding the tears I cannot.
Lydia starts her vows with, I fell in love with you because you chose me.
Milton says that he fell in love with Lydia because she challenges him and inspires him.
He never had a doubt about her and he hopes it continues that way forever.
They both say I do and kiss before the officiant tells them to!
They head off to their post-wedding gazebo and immediately start bickering.
They will be having the same fights until they die.
A montage of all the people who ended up single!
The lessons they learned!
Your English is so bad.
Bruh, that is your fucking wife.
No miscellaneous pod goss this week.
There arent enough other people floating around, and we already talked about Stacys $1,200 shoes.
See you for the reunion!
Bring on the Lacheys!
