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Picking an album title is one of the most sacred decisions a musician can make.
Hey, why not?
Its generic and lofty all at once: This isnt justanalbum, this is THE album.
The approach seems to be in vogue lately.
Since 2020, Chase Rice, Teyana Taylor, and Blackpink have all deliveredAlbums.
But this naming convention has a surprisingly far-ranging history.
In honor of the Jonases, were rankingevery album titledThe Album, from worst to best.
(Though I had to omit Caravans 1980 LPThe Album, as its currently unavailable to stream.
Sorry, Caravan.)
21.Chase Rice The Album(2021)
21.
Chase Rices mundane country-pop bangers have as much soul as an airport turkey-and-cheese sandwich.
Song most likely to double as a GOP presidential-campaign slogan:Drinkin Beer.
Amen
20.Daniel Schuhmacher The Album(2009)
20.
Soppiest ballad:kindly Stay Tonight
19.Shane Richie The Album(1997)
19.
BestAlbumcut:Kick This One
17.Cliff Richard The Album(1993)
17.
Leave this one under the tree for granddad.
Schmaltziest key change:Loves Salvation
16.DJ Shah The Album(2000)
16.
Trippiest oldies cover:Stand by Me
15.15.
Aunty Donna The Album(2018)
15.
Best secret track:Secret Track.
Pls Dont Listen
14.Haddaway The Album(1993)
14.
Haddaways throbbing Eurodance bangers tend to sound radiant in the club and monotonous anywhere else.
Both hits appear here twice, a good indication that no ones buying this thing for the deep cuts.
BestAlbumcut:What Is Love
13.Lil Rob The Album(2002)
13.
Most relatable anti-capitalist anthem:Barely Getting By
12.Terror Squad The Album(1999)
12.
Best preview of the Alchemists production talents:99 Live
11.Jonas Brothers The Album(2023)
11.
(They really coulda called thisWife Guy: The Album.)
Ishinos fractured, abrasive production style is the only constant.
Catchiest anatomy lesson:Turtels Have Short Legs
9.Hello Sailor The Album(1994)
9.
Oddly, heres one of the only straight-up rock albums calledThe Album.
And it aint bad!
BestAlbumcut:Black Dreams
8.The Federation The Album(2004)
8.
Best guest spots:What If I Had a Gun(feat.
Twista & Undaflow)
7.ABBA The Album(1977)
7.
Is this one calledABBA: The Albumor simplyThe Album?
Ah, who knows.
Not until Blink-182s not-quite-self-titled was there a high-profile album so ambiguously titled.
By late 1977, ABBA Fever was cooling, but these Swedes still had some juice.
Youve heard of Men at Work, now try Masters.
Trackmost crucialto the underground vogueing scene:The Ha Dance
5.Blackpink The Album(2020)
5.
BestAlbumcut:Ice Cream
4.4.
Teyana Taylor The Album(2020)
4.
Teyana Taylors third album is a sprawling monument to R&B ambition and excess.
Dirtiest slow jam:69
3.The Firm The Album(1997)
3.
(Sit back down, Kids See Ghosts.)
Best Ennio Morricone sample:Intro
2.Mantronix The Album(1985)
2.
& Rakims sample-rich grooves.
Among the albums famous fans is Beck, whonabbedhis Two turntables and a microphone!
sample from Needle to the Groove.
Best vocoder use:Mega-Mix
1.Latyrx The Album(1997)
1.
