Below Deck
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Fraser and Barbie, at long last, seem to conclusively make nice.
It helps that she good-naturedly cops to being a spoiled bitch who needs to grow up.
Who do I think I am?!
What can I say?
He apologizes; Ben looks on disapprovingly.
He promises to keep his head in the game, and they end up sourcing yellow towels.
On the bright side, Ben points out, at least they wont have to wash the stains out.
Barbie is predictably a little annoyed not to be recognized, but whatever.
In her own mind, she says,shes second stew.
In her own mind, I believe, the boat is named after her.
Our next primary, a luxury property manager from Iowa named Tina, is not picky.
She is pescatarian and wont eat eggs or tofu.
She refuses to drink from glass vessels, only plastic.
On the bright side, though, she is also very unpleasant and strange.
And yet, she is ultimately only a supporting character in the nightmare that is this charter.
(Nightmare for the crew, that is I, for one, am having a great time.)
The others soon catch up.
One of the guests jokes about peeing in the hot tub.
I am using the word jokes with approximately 30 percent confidence here.
The food looks great, though!
she asks in a confessional), then promptly manages to smash a glass.
Im detecting a pattern.
Tina hates her profiteroles because they taste like eggs.
The other guests complain that she didnt wait for them to start eating dessert.
Im done, Tina snaps, angrily getting up from the table and fleeing downstairs in tears.
Meanwhile, the other guests, nominally Tinas friends, are eager to complain about her in her absence.
Eileen, in particular, proves to be a mean drunk.
Barbara, lets go, she snaps at Barbie for not having anticipated her 38th drink order.
When Jared somehow gets roped into helping serve dinner, she tells him, Youre lucky youre good-looking.
Thats all you got going on.
This throwaway insult was apparently a bulls-eye, triggering his childhood trauma about not feeling good enough.
Jareds terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day just got even worse.
Eileen slips and falls getting out of the hot tub.
Barbie threatens to start watering down their drinks tomorrow.
Just tell her its a spa treatment.
